A while back my parents brought to my attention that there are times I, as Natalie's mother, do too much for Natalie ~ and planted a nibble in me that she needs to be more responsible with chores and morning routine. Out of that, I have seen Natalie's independence blossom. I find areas in her life that she is asking less of me and my help. Part of me still wants to do those things for her, but more of me understands the learning and growing experience that she needs to obtain from me backing off on some of her chores and hold her more accountable. My sister kept her for about two weeks a while back and I remember her telling me of an incident where her husband looked at my sister and said, "I'm sure Suzanne doesn't do every little thing for Natalie; relax and let Natalie figure a few things out on her own."
There are stages of life when we do things for our children that they cannot do for themselves. Out of love we don't stop doing those things, but we teach them how to do those things for themselves. In a round about way, I'm responsible to let Natalie succeed (or fail) on her own. Should she succeed, she grows, but should she fail, she also grows.
Just today I read an insert on a magazine I receive in the mail. This little story about a father and daughter fishing brought back memories of fishing with my dad and recent memories of Natalie fishing at the creek. The story was about the little girl praying for God to help her catch a fish. The father was hesitant to ask God for help... felt like his daughter was putting God on trial and knowing there has been times in his life such prayers or requests have not been answered. He didn't want to set false hope in his daughter. What if God thought this request was one not as important as others and decided not to answer it at this moment ~ thus setting false hope. But before he could explain to his daughter, she launched her prayer, "Jesus, please help me get a fish. Amen."
I feel the same way this father felt sometimes with Natalie... is that want or need really grant a prayer or request from God? What if He doesn't feel this as important as what Natalie does?
As a parent I want Natalie to grow in God and walk right next to Him. I feel it is my responsibility to pull that relationship together. The end of this story opened my eyes to the responsibility of motherhood. Needless to say, the little girl caught a fish. Several things here stand out to me... One being ~ there is no request or conversation "too big" for God. Although I may not justify all requests, God still looks and knows the desires of our heart and uses these to draw us closer to Him.
I cannot can pull Natalie closer to God. Today I have learned God pursues Natalie. He has a way of showing her His indescribable grace... by wooing her heart... by answering the little requests she launches ...in His own special way. It seems I have been trying to say and do all the right things in showing her the importance of a relationship with God; the walk; the talk... when it isn't my doing at all. I can and will continue to do all those things. Ultimately it is only our heavenly Father who will teach her to trust Him and grow her faith in His own special way just as He has done for me.
I'm so excited to see the life God has planned for Natalie and how she already has began a relationship with Him. But am more energized to see Natalie being pursued by my gracious, tender, child-loving God.
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